One in the same
by Getemono
Summary: If it had ended differently for Seifer...


-1Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VIII

How had he lost everything? How had his life gone so wrong? It had all been going so well, and now, he had nothing. Everyone turned their backs to him, even his friends that vowed they'd follow him wherever he went. There was one person who had taken everything, who had ended up on top since the beginning.

Squall Leonhart. As long as he could remember, his rival had effortlessly gotten everything he secretly yearned for. He was a SeeD, he was a leader, he was a hero. He was undoubtedly going to get the glory, and he could tell he already had Rinoa.

Their embrace was short, but it seemed to last forever to Seifer. He had found Rinoa first, but he supposed that he should be used to it by now. Whatever Seifer wanted, Squall got without even trying. He hated Squall. They broke apart and talked with the President of Esthar and Ellone, sis. They disappeared, and the President and Ellone walked away.

_Am I really that worthless?_ Seifer thought as they walked away. He was alone. Never before had he felt so used and abandoned. He wasn't bad, why did everyone think he was bad? He just wanted his time in the spotlight, just wanted to feel like he was worth something to someone.

Just because he didn't put his misery on display didn't mean that it wasn't there. He just didn't show it for everyone to see like Squall did. Everyone pitied him. Seifer remembered how concerned Quistis would be about Squall. She was always scolding him, and wasting her breath giving compliments to Squall. It's not like the bastard had even cared, he was too above that. Even his posse couldn't sense the loneliness inside of him.

Ultimecia had promised him worth. He was going to be her knight, the title he had dreamed of for so long. He was going to protect her with everything he had, and she was going to love him for it. He supposed in some corner of his mind he knew what he was doing was wrong, but he was living his dream. And for once he felt like he was needed, like he had a purpose. Who cared about right or wrong when you were happy?

Slowly, painfully, he rose to his feet, leaning on his gunblade for support. He hadn't even gotten his final showdown with Squall. No, it was three on one. _I guess he thought going one on one would waste time. What a jerk._ Again, he silently cursed his rival.

Within the past hour, he had gone from the Sorceress' Knight to a lowly villain. _So, I was expendable all this time, huh?_ He thought, giving a grim smile. _She was just using me_. He took a deep breath and stood upright. He still had some of his pride.

How come Squall got the happy ending? He pushed everyone away, but that only seemed to make them all try harder to get closer. No one had reached out to Seifer, no one had cared that maybe he needed someone to be there for him.

Was living even going to be worth it after all of this mess got solved? Where would the lunatic Pandora take him? Well, that didn't really matter, he'd be caught sooner or later. Probably executed for treason. Known throughout history as the biggest traitor, and despised for it.

There was a horrible noise, and Seifer turned to look. It was Adel, snapping her bones into the right places and healing the numerous flesh wounds that had been inflicted upon her. She had feigned death and even released Rinoa to get her second chance at world domination.

"That moron." Seifer muttered. Of course he had gone easy on Adel for fear of harming Rinoa. How weak could you get? If you had to kill a comrade to save the world, then so be it. But Squall had grown too soft. "He doesn't even know how to finish the job. Bring it on." He charged, knowing that he had only enough for this last battle.

He lunged, and his gunblade cut into her bare chest. She recoiled, but casted Quake on him in retaliation. He stumbled and fell, and didn't know if he could get back up. He casted Curaga. It didn't do much, but it was enough to keep him going. She casted Ultima, and he could feel his life draining.

"You're not much better off than I am." Seifer told her. "Looks like it all comes down to this." He was going to use his limit break. He attacked mercilessly, and flames engulfed the sorceress. But she wasn't going down without taking him with her. She struck him, stabbing through him before dematerializing.

"Shit." He muttered as he crumbled to the ground. All this because Squall didn't know how to get the job done. He'd probably fuck up the Ultimecia mission, too. Except this time Seifer wouldn't be there to clean it up. It was all Squall's fault…

No, even as he took in his last breaths, he couldn't believe that anymore. He knew, deep down that this was all mostly his fault. He could only hope that he had redeemed himself enough to get a good reincarnation.

"Hey," He said aloud, as though Squall would hear. "We'll have our fight, a real fight in the next life. I'll be waiting…"

He wasn't going to die hating Squall. He could finally see that in some ways they were one in the same.

Except Squall got his happy ending.

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Laguna entered the Ragnarok, seating Ellone on one of the seats.

"Gonna be okay, Elle?" He asked.

"yeah, just give me a little while, I'll be fine." She reassured him.

Laguna turned to the small albino woman and the dark, muscular man. He gave a small smile. "Maybe you should go get your friend. I think he needs you now."

"Is he hurt, ya know?" Raijin asked.

"Only his pride." Laguna joked. "He'll be fine."

"PRISON?" Fujin asked a little anxiously.

"Well, you guys are gonna have to pay for your actions one way or another…" Laguna said. "But, you guys aren't that bad. I'll see what I can do to lighten your sentence. And I can tell that boy out there isn't so horrible. A little confused is all. Now go on, get him so we can fly this thing!"

Fujin and Raijin nodded graciously and ran out of the Ragnarok.

"Seifer, Seifer!" Raijin called out when they reached the platform that Adel had emerged from. They saw his fallen form, his gunblade a few feet from his hand, his arms spread about him. They both knew something was wrong.

They ran to him, and Fujin shook him.

"Seifer! Seifer! Get up!" She was so scared she was speaking full sentences. "It's not funny, get up!"

"Fuu…" Raijin said sadly, pulling her away from their friend's body.

Seifer died as an unknown hero. No one had known the good he had done in his last moments. To some, he was still a traitor. To others, a despicable villain. But to one…

Squall stood at the foot of the plain grave and stared forlornly at it. He had come alone, because this was something that needed to be done alone. He could never figure Seifer out, and he wished that he had at least come to a conclusion before Seifer had died. He placed the rose on his tombstone and continued staring.

Some thought that Squall had killed Seifer, but his close friends knew better. Seifer had not been about to die when he left him.

"How did you die?" Squall asked again. "Who killed you?"

The tombstone sat in the dirt, unresponsive.

"Why do I feel like I owe you?" He asked, frustrated. "After all of this, why did you still come out on top?"

Still, no answer.

"I'm sorry." Squall said. He didn't know why he was apologizing after everything Seifer had put him through, but he felt like he owed him at least that much.

He walked from the grave, and it all came him. All of those outrageous acts, picking fights, protecting first Matron, then Ultimecia…

_We're one in the same…_ Squall thought. They had both been alone, except Squall wasn't alone anymore, and Seifer was rotting alone in a hole. They were almost the same.

Except Seifer had gotten the blameless way out.

A/N: Sorry if it doesn't make much sense or live up to standard, it was a spur of the moment thing, and it's very late.


End file.
